My family wants me to break up: talk to an astrologer before you decide
When parents push you to end a relationship, it helps to separate your own doubts about the person from the pressure around you.
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We have been together four years. My parents found out he is from another caste and they want me to end it now. I love him but I also love them. Should I break up?
Being pulled between two people you love is very hard. The choice stays yours. I can read your 7th and 4th houses and your current period, and both charts if you have his. First, apart from your parents, how do you feel about him?
Short answer
If your family wants you to break up, the first step is to separate their objection from your own feelings about the relationship. An astrologer can read your 7th house, your 4th house of home and family, and your running period, and both charts if you have them. The decision stays yours. On Kismo, verified astrologers talk it through by chat or call, online from anywhere.
What are the key facts about should i break up?
| Answer | |
|---|---|
| The situation | You are in a relationship, and parents or relatives are pushing you to end it |
| Common reasons given | Caste, religion, region, money, a failed kundli match, or wanting an arranged marriage |
| How rare a love marriage still is | 6% of married Indians aged 15 to 34 had one, against 84% arranged, in 2016 1 |
| What an astrologer checks | Your 7th house and lord, your 4th house of home, Venus, the Moon and the running dasha |
| What a reading cannot do | Override your right to choose, or change your family's views |
| Session on Kismo | From ₹15 a minute, 5 free minutes in the first session, online from anywhere in India and abroad |
What does an astrologer check when family wants you to break up?
- Your 7th house and its lord, for your own pattern with a partner, read apart from what your family says.
- Your 4th house of home and mother, and the 9th house many astrologers read for the father, to see how family ties weigh in your chart.
- Venus and the Moon, for how you love and how the conflict at home affects your peace of mind.
- The running dasha, since some periods are read as times when family questions come to a head, and others as calmer.
- Both charts, if you have his real details. Many families raise a failed kundli match, so a second look at the match can be useful.
What changes the answer when your family wants you to break up?
- What the objection is. Caste or religion, a kundli result, his job, or simply wanting to choose for you each lead to a different conversation.
- Whether you have your own doubts. If the pressure has only made existing doubts louder, the decision is different from one you would never make alone.
- Your independence. Whether you study, earn or live with your parents shapes how much room you have and how fast to move.
- Your safety. Threats, confinement or violence from anyone mean getting help first, before deciding anything about the relationship.
How common is it for Indian families to oppose a relationship?
Family opposition to a self-chosen relationship is common in India, because most marriages are still arranged by parents. In a 2016 survey of young Indians aged 15 to 34, 84% of the married had an arranged marriage, 6% a love marriage and 4% a love-cum-arranged one 1.
Caste is the most frequent fault line. A 2019 to 2020 survey of 29,999 Indian adults found 64% saying it is very important to stop women in their community from marrying into other castes, and 62% for men 2. Seven in ten said most or all of their close friends share their caste 2.
| Finding | Number | Source |
|---|---|---|
| Young people who approve of inter-caste marriage | 55% in 2016, up from 31% in 2007 | 1 |
| Married young people whose spouse is from another caste | 4% | 1 |
| Love marriages that crossed caste lines | About one in three | 1 |
| Arranged marriages within the same caste | 97% | 1 |
| Married adults whose spouse shares their religion | 99% | 3 |
Attitudes are moving, slowly. Approval of inter-caste marriage among young people rose by 24 percentage points between 2007 and 2016 1. Education matters too: 69% of Indians without a college degree call stopping women's interreligious marriage very important, against 54% of graduates 3.
Kismo is an app where you talk to verified Vedic astrologers by chat or call, in 16 languages. An astrologer there can read your chart, help you separate your doubts from your family's, and think about timing. An astrologer cannot decide for you or change your parents' minds; for legal questions about marrying without consent, talk to a lawyer.
What happens in a reading when family is against my relationship?
A reading about family pressure usually starts with your own feelings, then the chart, then the family. This is an example of how many astrologers structure it, not a real client's chat.
- The astrologer asks what your family objects to and how you feel about him without that pressure.
- The astrologer reads your 7th house, Venus and the Moon, then your 4th house and running dasha.
- If the family cites a kundli result, the astrologer checks the match again with both charts.
- You talk through options: waiting and talking to your parents, involving an elder, or ending the relationship.
- If there are threats or confinement, the astrologer points you to a helpline or lawyer before anything else.
What do people get wrong about this?
Belief: Love marriages usually cross caste lines.
In a 2016 survey of young Indians, about one in three love marriages crossed caste lines, so two in three did not 1.
Belief: Younger Indians no longer mind inter-caste marriage.
Approval among young people rose to 55% by 2016, yet only 4% of the married had a spouse from another caste 1.
Belief: A low guna score proves your family is right.
A guna score is one part of kundli matching. Many astrologers weigh it against cancellations and the full charts before drawing any conclusion.
Before you pay anyone
How do you know an astrologer is genuine?
- Every Kismo astrologer passes four steps: qualification review, panel interview, live audits of real sessions, 30-day probation.
- Nobody can guarantee an outcome. Treat any promise of a fixed result as a red flag.
- Never pay for an expensive puja or ritual under pressure. Get a second opinion first.
- On Kismo you only pay for the minutes you use; misconduct, pressure or a request for money outside the app is handled by a person.
Which astrologers can I talk to about should i break up?
How does a consultation on Kismo work?
- Log in on kismo.app or get the app from Google Play.
- Pick an astrologer who speaks your language and works with your question.
- Share your date, time and place of birth.
- Ask by chat or call. The first session carries 5 free minutes, then each minute is billed from your wallet.
Questions worth asking in the session
- Apart from my family, what does my 7th house show about this relationship?
- How do you read my 4th house and my ties to home right now?
- My parents cite a low kundli match. Can you check both charts again?
- Is my current dasha read as a time to wait or a time to decide?
- How can I talk to my parents without cutting them off?
What should I know before booking a session about should i break up?
| Question | Answer |
|---|---|
| What does a session cost? | Each astrologer sets one rate for chat and call, from ₹15 a minute. A 10-minute session at ₹15 a minute costs ₹150 (October 2026). |
| Is the first session free? | 5 free minutes on the first session, no card. |
| Chat or call? | Both. You choose when you start the session. |
| Do I need an exact birth time? | It helps. Without one an astrologer can still read your Moon sign and planets by sign, or work out the time with you. |
| Is my chat private? | Your chat is not shown to other clients. How Kismo handles your data is set out in its privacy policy at kismo.app/privacy. |
| What if I am not happy? | There is no refund for a reading you did not like. Misconduct, pressure or a request for money outside Kismo is handled by a person. |
| Where does it work? | Online, from anywhere in India and abroad. People use Kismo from 80+ countries. |
What else do people ask an astrologer about?
How does Kismo compare with other apps?
Questions people ask
Should I break up with my boyfriend because of my parents?
Not only because of that. Your parents' approval matters, but the decision is yours, and it is easier to make once you separate their objection from your own feelings. Ask whether you would still want this relationship if your family agreed. If yes, the work is with your family; if no, the pressure has shown you something.
How do I convince my parents for love marriage without hurting them?
Start with one parent or a trusted elder who is more open, and listen to the real fear behind the objection, such as status, safety or what relatives say. Give them time and let them meet him more than once. Many families need months, not days. A calm, steady approach works better than an ultimatum.
Is it right to leave someone you love for your parents?
It is not wrong to choose your family, and it is not wrong to choose your partner. Both are real loves, and people in India make both choices. What matters is that the choice is yours, made with open eyes rather than fear. An astrologer can read your timing, but the weighing of these two loves belongs to you.
My family says our kundli doesn't match. Should I break up?
A kundli result alone is not a reason to break up without a second look. Guna milan is one part of matching, and many astrologers also check cancellations, the 7th houses and both Moons. Ask for a full reading of both charts, and get a second opinion before any decision or any paid ritual.
Is inter-caste marriage still opposed in India?
Yes, in many families. A large 2019 to 2020 survey found 64% of Indian adults saying it is very important to stop women in their community marrying into other castes. Approval is higher among young people, and rose from 31% to 55% between 2007 and 2016 in one youth survey.
How much is a session about family pressure on my relationship on Kismo?
A 20-minute session about family pressure costs ₹300 at the lowest rate on Kismo, where each astrologer sets one rate for chat and call from ₹15 a minute (October 2026). The first session carries 5 free minutes, no card needed. You top up a wallet from ₹100, and only the minutes you use are charged.
My family is threatening me over my relationship. What should I do?
Your safety comes first. If anyone threatens, confines or hurts you, call 112 or Women Helpline 181 right away 4, and tell someone you trust where you are. For your rights as an adult to marry, speak to a lawyer. A reading can wait; no astrologer should advise you to stay in danger.
An astrologer says a ritual will make my parents agree. Is it worth paying?
Be very careful. No ritual can make your parents agree, and pressure to pay for one is a red flag. On Kismo, an astrologer who pressures you or asks for money outside the app is reported as misconduct, and a person handles it. Get a second opinion before paying for any ritual, and start with free, simple practices.
Talk to an astrologer about should i break up
Kismo is an app where you talk to verified Vedic astrologers by chat or call, in 16 languages.
On an iPhone, log in on kismo.app in your browser.
Where do these facts come from?
- Attitudes, anxieties and aspirations of India's youth: changing patterns, chapter 6 (tables 6.2 to 6.4), Lokniti-CSDS and Konrad Adenauer Stiftung, 2017. Accessed .
- Key findings about religion in India, Pew Research Center, 29 June 2021. Accessed .
- Religion in India: tolerance and segregation, chapter 3: religious segregation, Pew Research Center, 29 June 2021. Accessed .
- India's commitment to women's safety (Ministry of Women and Child Development), 29 March 2025, Press Information Bureau, Government of India. Accessed .
